Bug#270967: Ere on the instant." "Remember!" hissed McFeckless, grasping h

[Bleser]

 of animals. I argued that if animals conversed, why shouldn't inanimate
things communicate with each other? You cannot prove that animals don't
converse--neither can you prove that inanimate objects DO NOT. See?" I
was thunderstruck with the force of his logic. "Of course," he
continued, "there are degrees of intelligence, and that makes it
difficult. For instance, a mahogany table would not talk like a
rush-bottomed kitchen chair." He stopped suddenly, listened, and
replied, "I really couldn't say." "I didn't speak," I said. "I know YOU
didn't. But your chair asked me 'how long that fool was going to stay.'
I replied as you heard. Pray don't move--I intend to change that chair
for one more accustomed to polite society. To continue: I perfected
myself in the language, and it was awfully jolly at first. Whenever I
went by train, I heard not only all the engines said, but what every
blessed carriage thought, that joined in the conversation. If you chaps
only knew what rot those whistles can get off! And as for the brakes,
they can beat any mule driver in cursing. Then, after a time, it got
rather monotonous, and I took a short sea trip for my health. But, by
Jove, every blessed inch of the whole ship--from the screw to the
bowsprit--had something to say, and the bad language used by the
garboard strake when the ship rolled was something too awful! You don't
happen to know what the garboard strake is, do you?" "No," I replied.
"No more do I. That's the dreadful thing about it. You've got to listen
to chaps that you don't know. Why, coming home on my bicycle the other
day there was an awful row between some infernal 'sprocket' and the
'ball bearings' of the 
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